1. His sons said you can never take the place of their dead mother.
2. Your nickname is “Godot”.
3. Those shoes were really expensive and you already dropped one of them.
4. Bono told him that bed of nails is wicked uncomfortable.
5. He trained for that 10K for months, no way you’re messing up his chip time.
6. “Bated breath” is not spelled “b-a-i-t-e-d”, wanker.
7. He’d been waiting for a girl like you to make him feel alive but recently realized that he’d get the same results from a 5 Hour Energy shot.
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I’m back In the Powder Room today with a “this could only happen in real life” story called The Remarkable, Functional Female Body. Come on by, even if you already know that your body’s a wonderland.
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I knew we were friends. Love me some Mumford.
*cue music* Our friendship was meant to be, meant to be.
Girl, I’m down with anything involving a banjo.
There. I said it.
XOXO
A.
Viva la Mumford! When they and my Akron homeboys The Black Keys killed it at the Grammys, I realized there is hope for the music business after all.