Excuse me while I Pop, Lock and Drop It

by Shari on June 17, 2011

Piercedpug
Not sure if I mentioned this, but I'm presently in sunny Florida, dodging alligators, teaching acting, and writing comedy scenes and monlogues for 67 small actors. I'm a little tired. Actually, I'm so fried you could flip me with a spatula.

Earlier this year, I had written a short play and six rap songs for a children's theater in Baltimore. And let me tell you, my rap was so bangin' that the director wrote me an email, saying "your knowledge of drug slang is actually freaking me out a bit."

Ever since, I've been feeling pretty off the heezy fo sheezy.

But yesterday, I discovered that I'm wack.

I was teaching my comedy improvisation class and we were doing an exercise called "Pet Peeve Rant". It's a fun little game where a person names their biggest pet peeve and the person next to them takes it as his own and does a huge, yelling rant about it.

So one of my kids said, "I can't stand people who pop, lock and drop it in public." And the girl next to him went into a raging rant, "Ohhhh! People who pop, lock and drop it in public make me insane! Especially when they pop, lock and drop it in the grocery store! Or in church! How dare they pop, lock and drop it right in my face!"

I was enjoying her ranting so much that it took me a minute to realize that I had no clue what she was talking about.

Tragically, I had no idea what "pop, lock and drop it" meant.

Usually I don't care about being square. But I guess ever since my rap victory, I've been treasuring my insider status and I had this sudden fear that one of my kids was going to turn to me and say "Hey, Miss Shari, we want to hear your views on popping, locking and dropping!" Then my secret would be out fo shiggedy.

The exercise went on, but my mind would not stop. "What could it mean? To make out with someone? I guess you wouldn't want to see that in the dairy section of your ShopRite. Or when the preacher is doling out communion. And I wouldn't want someone popping, locking and dropping it all up in my grill. But that doesn't really sound right. Is it a gun? No, someone popping and locking a piece and then dropping me, that's not something you rant about, that's something you alert the authorities about. What could it mean?"

Imagine my surprise when I Googled and found out that it was a dance move. For those of you who are as wack as myself, "Pop, Lock and Drop It" was a single released by Huey in 2006.

At first I was horrified that not only was I out of it, but I was out of it dating back five years.

And then I remembered something. I had a baby in late 2005. So in 2006 I was dealing with an infant, a toddler, a puppy and a curmudgeonly older pug who was royally pissed about being displaced as Alpha. For me, 2006 did not exist.

In other words, I was popping (babies), locking (dogs in their crate) and dropping (hints about a vasectomy) in my own way.

True dat. Fo shizzle.

{ 10 comments… read them below or add one }

deborah l quinn June 17, 2011 at 7:04 pm

Is it snoop dogg who is the fo shizzle guy (my kids are older, have been thus out of all loops even longer than you) – anyway – this may be why male rappers come up w/all the dope slang, yo? bc they don’t actually BIRTH the babies.
Your post is freaking, fucking, hysterical & I think that pop, lock, and drop will become a new birthing room mantra. True dat.

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dusty earth mother June 17, 2011 at 7:15 pm

Great idea, Deborah. Im actually not fo shizzle who the fo shizzle guy is, but I think you and I should start visiting Lamaze clsses with our new birthing mantra.

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Butterfingers for Breakfast June 17, 2011 at 8:17 pm

Oh my goodness, you are too funny! Popping and locking! Love it! I am still in that mode…toddler and infant (well now two toddlers–2 and 1). When push comes to shove, the dog gets the crate (or in our case, the back porch). Love her, but a woman’s hormones are a force to be reckoned with. Thanks for the laugh, as always :)

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Alexandra June 18, 2011 at 6:24 am

Oh
em
gee
HYSTERICAL.
Your version of pop lock drop.
DYING HERE.
x0

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dusty earth mother June 18, 2011 at 6:25 am

oh, so youre still in that phase, huh, Brooke? Bless you, girl. A special pop, lock and drop to you.

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Alison@Mama Wants This June 18, 2011 at 8:07 am

And here I was thinking pop, lock & drop meant:
Pop the baby out, lock up the exit point (where baby came out) and drop all pretenses that sex is even remotely on the table.
Oh, that was just new mom me talking. Heh.
(18 months is still considered ‘new’ mom right?)

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dusty earth mother June 18, 2011 at 6:01 pm

Absolutely, Alison. My kids are six and five and I still consider myself a new mom.

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Marinka June 19, 2011 at 4:58 am

That is totally neato AND rad!

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Lady Jennie June 19, 2011 at 1:29 pm

So So Good.
I just thought it was another version of stop drop and roll.

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James Christian Jr June 20, 2011 at 5:44 pm

I’m sure the vasectomy weren’t too subtle at some point.

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